Battlestar Galactica (The New Series) - I don't get it

JoDee recently borrowed the miniseries disc of Battlestar Galactica (the new series) from the library. After watching some of it, I realized I didn't much care for what was going on. Don't get me wrong, I can totally see what people see in this series, but I realized that it wasn't for me. My major problem witht he series was the Cylons. I did some more research on the web about the series on the various wikis, and offer this opinion of why I think the Cylons from the new series of Battlestar Galactica don't make much sense:

  • Humans created the Cylons. This much I get. It's different from the old series, in which we managed to tick off some reptilian / cybernetic race and caused them to want us dead dead dead. In the new version we have these robotic servants, whom we created, and managed to tick off with one too many cords of wood or something. Now they too want us dead dead dead. So, there was already the big war, where both sides decided on a peace. Cool. I'm OK with peace, and broken treaties and what-not. But then they had to bring in pieces of the old series into the picture, like the old Cylons and weaponry. Sure, it was a tip of the hat, but it came off pretty silly.
  • Cylons have replicated humans. Oh, so now instead of complete annihilation of man, we now get to play "The Thing" and figure out who is a Cylon and who isn't. I completely loathe movies where they use this tactic, as it is generally played for cheap suspense thrills. "Oh! They look like us, talk like us, and even drink hard liquor like us." The twist in this series is apparently they can have sex with humans and procreate. No wonder this series was so popular. Hot alien robot women who want to have sex with you, and then kill you. Great, sign me up.
  • Cylons have reincarnation. OK, so when they die, they get uploaded and sent to a "ressurection ship" where they're recreated and sent back. So, assuming infinite resources, these folks will just keep coming back. Hey, they're already better than humans. Perhaps humanity needs to just pack it in and call it a day.
  • Cylons can't procreate without humans. Lessee here... they've mastered immortality, but haven't mastered reproduction. This makes sense how?
  • Cylons are religious. OK, but they're not all creator-worshipping, because the humans created them, and now the Cylons are trying to kill their creators. Apparently this was required to make conversations with the humans that much more awkward.
  • Cylons have 12 models. Hey, I know a great story line. We'll say there's 12 models of robots that look like humans, but we'll only introduce a few. That way, we'll have revelations later when it's revealed what Cylons are what models. We'll call it suspense.
  • Cylon Raiders are living organisms. And they're like ponies. Big, crescent-shaped killing ponies. With guns.

And that's only the surface of my complaints with the Cylons. I mean, the original series didn't make much sense with the various members of Cylon-society, but it was also a freaking TV show in an era where good science fiction TV shows were rare at best. I know they were making some of this stuff up as they went along. This new version of Cylon-society is just whacked out and makes absolutely no sense whatsoever. I know part of it is because CGI effects are expensive, but there's better ways to compromise than trying to figure out who the mole is this week.

I never understood the whole life-cycle of the aliens from Alien either (egg, face hugger, human inclubation, chest-burster, big effing alien, wash, rinse, repeat), but at least they kept it simple. It seems no attempts were made with the reimagined Battlestar Galactica. Sorry, but I don't think I'll ever watch the rest of this series, and will keep the old Battlestar Galactica movie as my only link to this series.


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