Jupiter Ascending: Jupiter replaced by a houseplant

Wed 30 December 2015 | tags: Reviews

Jupiter Ascending, or why the role of Jupiter could be played by a house plant

JoDee and I recently watched the movie Jupiter Ascending. JoDee and I were talking about the movie afterward and it occurred to me that the role of Jupiter is completely superfluous to the movie, and is a Living MacGuffin. Worse, the story makes more sense if the character Jupiter was some form of rare houseplant than an actual character.

If Jupiter were a houseplant:

  1. The discovery of the Jupiter Houseplant brings about the side-quest to protect it from the "bad guys" who have also detected the presence of the plant. It gets "saved" by the angelic bad-ass character.
  2. The Jupiter Houseplant gets taken to the one brother. It gets "saved" again by the angelic bad-ass character.
  3. The Jupiter Houseplant is stolen again by the other brother, and taken to Jupiter for processing (the plant has some rare ability, as do several other plants, but this is the special plant). It gets "saved" again by the angelic bad-ass character.
  4. The whole scene with the sister gets deleted because it doesn't add anything to the story.

This makes a tighter story because it doesn't have the problems of stem-cell harvesting (which can be obviated by this thing we call "cloning").

And this is why I thought Jupiter Ascending was a weak movie. When you can replace an entire character with a houseplant and have your story still make sense you have a problem.