Checking in for 2023-07-12:

Content warning: some mention of bodily functions.

• Sitting here getting chemo. The main attraction is the Bevacizumab (aka Mvasi / Avastin / Zirabev, depending on which your insurance will cover). So far so good. I'm here with JoDee this time around.
• I think some of my issues with diarrhea are psychosomatic. I drove today and for most of it I was worrying about crapping myself. Turns out I didn't have much to worry about but it's still something that looms in my periphery. I'm working on being OK with these feelings and allowing myself to feel them without any judgment. It's hard though. Yesterday during the "Lean Coffee" segment of MUG I had to use the restroom midway through, and literally did part of the moderation from my phone via ssh and tmux. It wasn't ideal, but we managed. I think that's the mindset I need to use from here on out.
• And I'm done with chemo for today. This was a bit of a surprise, but because the doses of the Bevacizumab have been lessened from 90 minutes to 30 minutes I'm home way before I thought I would be. It was a bit disconcerting because we tend to pack pretty extensively for chemo (in part because it's usually several hours). We didn't even get into our provisions before I was released. I'm not sure what I'll do with my "free time".

More as I know it.