Getting older? Buy a laser printer

(This first appeared on Mastodon but it bears repeating)

As you get older you will need to print more things in your life.

Buy yourself a good laser printer.

Not an ink-jet printer; an honest, hard-working, toner-driven black-and-white laser printer.

Toner doesn't dry out and you'll be able to get about 5,000 pages before your first major repair (usually the drum).

Bonus points for getting one with duplex, FAX, and a scanner / copier w/ auto sheet feeder.

Now, you may say "but Craig, I live in the 21st century and have no need of this thing you call 'paper'. I am from the future."

Yes, yes you are, but everyone else is still stuck in the 20th century. Worse, they'll email you a PDF and expect you to mail it back to them because we live in the perverse timeline where bits becoming paper is the only way people interact.

Get a laser printer and a toner cartridge and tell me how many documents you print in 5 years.

Worst case you'll never have to use past the 1,000 sheet starter-cartridge they give you.

Best case is you'll thank me right after the machine is telling you to replace the laser assembly (like the one behind me).

Trust me, you don't want to have to go rent a printer at Kinkos / Staples / Office whatever when you need to print out a document in a hurry.

And inkjet printers do not cut it. They will fail you.

Black and White, duplex, multi-function laser printer. Accept no substitutes.