Today marks my second chemo round. I'm doing a lot better this time around. The first time I received the side effects for Camptosar, which threw me for a loop. I found out later that JoDee tends to grab the side effects before I can read them. She knows my tendency to over-analyze things (Hey, it's only hypochondria if you can't Google it). This time around I just relaxed into whatever would come my way. This is something I've been practicing with.
I found this quote on Mastodon in a screenshot. It's from CryptoNature on Twitter:
"We seldom admit the seductive comfort of hopelessness.
It saves us from ambiguity.
It has an answer for every question: "There's just no point."
Hope, on the other hand, is messy.
If it might all work out then we have things to do.
We must weather the possibility of happiness."
I'm weathering those possibilities. It's a radical way of thinking for me.