Today was round 12 / 12 of chemo for me. Or at least that's what I thought. Actually I have a few more rounds of chemo that were ordered yesterday. So I think that' round 12 / 15 or something. I'm not entirely sure. I just know that I've got two more months of chemo to plow through where before I thought I was done.
I'm not mad or bitter about this. My body has been doing OK with the chemo treatments (outside of the occasional bout of diarrhea, which I liken to taking Magnesium Citrate). I've noticed my energy really waning today. I've fallen asleep with the laptop in my lap for a bit.
I noticed today that social media was pretty much the only thing I was capable of today, which ran against my "semi-social" challenge. I noticed myself bending the rules to accommodate me having limited energy and wanting to have a bit of comfort during the procedure. I think this has been part of my issues with social media: the desire to feel connected mixed with the feelings that I don't have much else to give right now. It's an easy fix.
I'll need to determine how best to proceed with this. Part of me wants to cancel this challenge and part of me wants to see where it leads. I know for certain that I'm not going to join Twitter, but at the very least I want to understand my motivations better on what my relationship is with social media and if it's suiting a need that needs situating or if this is junkie-talk.